random thoughts of the day

I just finished reading the most recent post on a friend's blog. In it she questions whether she will ever get her shit figured out and if not is she normal. My question is, what is normal? And who determines whether we are normal or not? If you ask me, I can definitely tell you I am not normal, nor do I want to be. I like going against the grain. Wouldn't life be dull if we were all normal? Because isn't being normal mean being like everyone else? And do I really want to have all of my shit figured out? For the most part, I can say that I am pretty happy with the path I have chosen for myself. Sure, I would like to have a family of my own but I have proven to myself that I can survive on my own. Living by myself scared me to death. But now, I can't imagine sharing it with anyone else. I have my own routine and it is nice and quiet. Well, except for the dogs and the off kilter washing machine upstairs. I look at my brother and my sister. Both have been married. My brother for 15 years and my sister 2 times with the longest one lasting 4 1/2 years. Are/were they happy? I really don't think so. My sister is heading in that direction now but my brother is and has not been for years. His wife holds things over his head. Everything that goes wrong is his fault and he has to somehow always come up with the solution to the latest problem. The recurring issue with them is money. I love my brother but I can not stand the woman he chose for his wife. I have tried. I always wanted an older sister. But she is not what I wanted. I wouldn't trade his two girls for anything. But for a woman that works in a bank and can balance her drawer every night, she sure has a hard time balancing her checkbook and getting bills paid. Now don't get me wrong, I have had my fair share of money troubles but I soon recognized what I needed to do to correct the situation and what to do so that it didn't happen again. She has not learned that. My parents have helped them many times over the 15 years but as my dad put it, the well has run dry. And not once has that woman thanked my parents for their help. Top this off with the fact that my brothering is losing his job to cutbacks the 1st of December. If it weren't for the girls, I know he would have cut his losses by now. But, my brother is a stand up guy and will honor the vows he made. His health is not the greatest and my fear is that something is going to happen to him. I don't know how much more he can take. I think the best thing is for him to go through with bankruptcy and then file for divorce. He has put up with a lot of emotional abuse from her over the years and it needs to stop. Jeff has no self-worth anymore. Those of you that have known me for awhile know how my sister-in-law can be. You have witnessed the beast in action. I have always been close with my siblings but over the last few years, I haven't been as close to Jeff. I think the distance has something to do with it. But I don't call their house because it is hard to talk to him when she is there. He is a different person when Mary is there. I want my brother back.